A much-needed feature

Since we were traveling on Valentine’s Day, we observed it on this past Friday. Our gift this year: We went in together on a coffee pot, which is easily the most important item in our house. Like everyone else, we went to Target, where we saw this hilarious product description (for a model we didn’t buy):

I think $59.99 is an excellent price for a “Permanent God Filter,” which I think you’d pretty much need after using anything with “complete frontal access.” In general it would be nice to have after teaching Darwin, or any of the Victorian faith-and-doubt literature, or Freud, or anything else provocative. And I have relatives who would be warded off by such a filter, too.

Having said that, reading about this “pantented feature” doesn’t exactly inspire me with confidence; plus, I really think the Target Team Member who made tag must’ve been drunk: “Easy add water and coffee without moving around counter” doesn’t even parse.

While the coffee maker we bought won’t filter out God, it does make a serviceable pot of coffee without leaking all over the kitchen, which is really all we wanted.

In other news, the answer to this question is: Because the busybody technician who installed the heater turned it way down–under 110 degrees–“because you have a child.” Which is true, but we also live in Connecticut, where it’s been known to get cold. A few turns of a phillips-head screwdriver later, the heater’s reset to ~125, and there’s hot water a-plenty.

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to A much-needed feature

  1. Alex says:

    Yeah, The god filter could be a fairly marketable product, save for the fact that walmart would never carry it.

    Also, it should be noted that the maker of this coffee…maker is an anagram for “God in Hel(l)” (or maybe Hel In God?)

    Words can be fun.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *